fuck it - i quit....
tonight i realized that whatever it was i thought was "confidence" or "fearlessness" is gone. my ability to approach is currently non-existent. once again, i find myself terrified - not of rejection, but rather, of the evil D&D whores. there's too many girls w/ bf's and it's getting hard to tell which ones are single and interested. especially when the one's w/ bf's (or are "kinda seeing someone, nothing official or anything") still want to talk to you and let you buy them a drink or take them to dinner.
i don't care...
i was at a party where they rented out the lower level of Hampton's and it was kinda cool. i couldn't figure out what was up w/ the chix. who was w/ who? who might of been interested. there were only a couple of chix i would've been interested, but intermittently they would be hanging off some dude(s) or dancing w/ other guys. i was too intimidated to even approach them.
clubs and loud places don't work for me. i agree w/ a friend's apprehension about girls met in a bar. where should i look? at the library or the grocer's market?
fuck it.... i don't care right now.
i have 2 tix for the symphony this weekend. i even asked for the shift off from work. i've asked the girl i dated in feb if she'd go w/ me... thus far she's ignored me (#2 from post 1 - if you're keeping score). i also asked the ex (girl #1 from post 1) she said no, so i asked if she had any single friends who would be interested in going. that ended as delightfully as one would expect. idk who to ask. maybe i'll just eat the cost of the ticket and go alone.... pick up some chick there. you know, b/c that's so likely to happen.
FML
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