i'm sitting here typing and looking at the clock which reads 30 sept 2010 23:05. that means that 2010 is nearly over. by extension, the first full decade of this millennium is nearly over. and here @ VCL, that fact is causing me to reflect on the shit that's happened since the clock turned over into the 2XXX's.
seriously, i don't know where the fuck to start... i'm okay with saying that this full decade has been largely shit with an occasional good thing tossed in here & there. i've made some good friends & lost others. graduated w/ a bachelor's degree and master's degree in 6 total years. turned into a financial disaster. found out what it's like to live fully alone. broke up w/ a long term gf. increased my total rejection totals. dated a few girls. hooked up w/ one that was only the 2nd (of 2, as of now) that i truly loved - then she moved out of state and our friendship fell apart, to the point that we haven't spoken in nearly 4yrs - nevermind the fact that we never got to have a 'real relationship' like i wanted, more than anything. rules that were made for a reason have been broken. i've gone out with girls i've worked with, been in class with, ones that have been inappropriately young... i've lived in the poverty of both a college student and a working-poor stiff. moved my life to a new state. competed in triathlons and half-marathons, started playing hockey. i've traveled to toronto, virgina beach, nyc, philly, indy, ottawa, thousand islands. started backpacking, took up photography, writing, blogging... made an ass of myself. said inappropriate things. had numerous impure thoughts about people i shouldn't have such thoughts about. around my 29th birthday, i lost my shit and altered nearly every aspect of my life, by the time 30 rolled around, i went back to the way i was before. i've been turned down for over 50 jobs in my field and have a job that barely pays my bills, is unrewarding and, frankly - is depressing the fuck out of me. my life is lived in a state of confusion that can hold it's own to the confusion that surrounds the state of the world as a whole....
the world around me has changed, living in a post-9/11 world. war is ubiquitous. the raping of our planet's resources hasn't slowed down, climates are still changing, the economy is in the shitter. the "sides" in this nation are increasingly divided. the middle east is still a mess. china scares the shit out of me. canada's replaced the soviet union in olympic hockey domination... petrol prices went out of control and haven't gone back down to reasonable levels. people are fascinated with obtaining "fame" & "celebrity" status through reality television / twitter / youtube internet sensationalism.
like i said, i don't know where to begin... or that i could possibly include everything here...
